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User blog:Tadano Hitoshi/Ragtag Hustle Kancolle Edition - Everyday Hustle 2
(The previous one was gone due to me pressing the "Publish" button when the Wikia is undergoing some maintenance. It was quite a lengthy one complete with formatting. Now I'll have to rewrite this from scratch...) 'Battleship Yamato ' 'Battleship Yamato 2' I am the battleship, Yamato. The symbol of pride and might of the Imperial Japanese Navy... or was. In actuality, a secret weapon waiting to be unleashed to the world at times of peril. ... I wish I could say that like how Musashi would be able to without feeling awkward about it. In the end I was sent to be sunk as a symbol of a brave, but futile effort. '' ''"This war is of our nation and why should the honor of our "surface fleet" be more respected? Who cares about their glory? Damn fools!" That was one of the voices I heard before I along with Yahagi and our escort fleet were given this final task of mine. Hirihoukenten (非理法権天)... 'Foolishness is not above sensibility, sensibility is not above law, law is not above authority, and authority is not above divinity...' I wonder, where does an honorable man of reason sit in all these? ... And now I am here again, with this human form. Unlike before, I am now very conscious of what I was. But why this form? Other than fighting, what am I here for? -- 'Battleship Yamato 3' Admiral: "As a person with quite an interest regarding the history of things, I must say yours are one of the most impressive that I've ever read. Discounting the overall tone of it. You were built at a very great cost and ended your life with a very great cost, but at the same time it shows a very negative nuance about your overall existence. Your creation was quite the engineering feat, but you were too late for your time. Then again, those are what makes the facts about you interesting. But now you're here as an existence people call 'ship girls.' Gee, this world is just amazing." Yamato: "... And you're bringing this topic up because...?" Admiral: "Just some historical studies about you for myself." Yamato: "And what good would that bring you?" Admiral: "Interesting things to know about. Tell me, Yamato, what does it feel to be human?" Yamato: "Being a human...?" Admiral: "Yes." Yamato: "How do I put it... it's strange." Admiral: "If you may elaborate on that, pretty please?" Yamato: "My former existence was just a large ship. The Battleship Yamato, the largest and most powerful ever built in the world. Though it was promising on paper, in actuality I did very little. Having been given life into this human body, apart from fighting these existence called the Abyssals, I am pretty lost on what else I should be living this life for." Admiral: "Oh, you can live for a lot of things. It wasn't until I had a few close run-ins with Death that I learned to appreciate life better. Let me tell you, I was never this talkative back then. Funny, isn't it, that Death of all things are teaching you lessons about life." Yamato: "Life experience with Death...?" Admiral: "How I worked myself till you see this person standing before you was not a pretty sight to behold. It's either sink or swim. One bout of bad luck and I might not be standing here right now. There's more to life than the negativity it throws at us. There's a wise saying that goes like this: 'When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.' " Yamato: "And exactly how are life, lemons and lemonade connected...?" Admiral: "Some people make connection to the bad things happening with life with lemons because lemons are sour, and we have moments in life we can call 'sour.' Lemonade is a sweet and refreshing drink, it's used in the saying as a symbol towards a good outcome from the 'lemons'. Put these together and you get what I'm trying to say, do you?" Yamato: "That you can benefit from bad experiences in life?" Admiral: "Correct! By the way, Yamato, I hear you're famous for your ramune." Yamato: "Could it be that you started the entire conversation for that...?" Admiral: "No, I'm not asking for one. It just so happened that I thought of it after saying 'lemons' and 'lemonade.'" Yamato (goes silent for a bit, then lets out a giggle): "... Fufu. You're an amusing person. Here, have one." Admiral: "Eh, I said I didn't ask for one, did I?" Yamato: "Take it as a sincere gift from me." Admiral: "That 'sincere gift' sounds odd." Yamato: "No need for the modesty, you're an Admiral after all. As the former flagship of the Combined Fleet, I had a lot of hospitality for high-ranked officers back then, you know." Admiral: "That's true but..." Yamato: "You don't need to feel so indebted, it's just a bottle of ramune. By the way, will you join me for dinner today?" Admiral: "Is that an invitation? How about if I bring the rest along? Akagi looks like she could blow some holes in her guts since we've not been getting much activity this week because of my paperwork that has been piling up." Yamato: "No, just the two of us." Admiral: "... Is this a...?" Yamato: "No, but I think there's a lot that I should learn from you. It would be nice to hear them as we sit down together for our meal." Admiral: "... All right... (I don't like where this is going.)" -- 'The Battleships Who Don't Do Anything' Admiral: (... I just can't go with fine diners. Even if it's just with Yamato, fine dining carries a lot of formalities with it, I don't want to have to go through all that for just a plate of food. That aside, though, even though I told them to hang out here just because I wanted to have faces to see while I do work, this is just...) Admiral's attention is turned towards a table. Sitting at the table are the battleships Yamato, Mutsu, Ise, Hyuuga, Kirishima and Haruna. Yamato: "Admiral? Are you taking a break from the paperwork?" Mutsu: "Come over here for a bit, we could use a nice chat to fill up our time." Admiral: "I believe I trusted you lot to entertain requests for exercises if I happen to be away from the office at times, but aren't you being a bit too relaxed?" Ise: "Well, the ones who came to us are pretty easy to entertain, though. Those new Zuiuns are good! Even their carriers have a hard time swatting these away. I wish we can get more of this." Admiral: "And what happened when you engaged the fleets with thick air defense layered on them? I'm not reading some good reports here." Ise: "Well, about that... er, heh heh." Admiral: "Figures. Next time I should remind you to not engage with your planes. Since the vessels who lead air defenses can be dealt with your gunfire in the first place, I suggest you try sniping them from your range... Wait, Haruna? You seem to be a bit down... whoa!?" Mutsu (flanking the Admiral, with Haruna following suit): "You want to know why? It's because you've been so cold lately~ We, the proud battleships of your fleet, need some skinship too you know? Yet you refused to give anyone else the time of the day after that one time at all... Right, Haruna''-chan?" '''Haruna ''(weakly):' "Haruna... wants to be headpatted more by the Admiral... but Haruna hasn't been given anything to do lately, Haruna is not feeling all right... what should Haruna do..." '''Admiral:' "Er, I believe one of the first things you can do right now is give me some personal space?" Mutsu: "No~pe. You see, we know how some Admirals love harassing their shipgirls relentlessly, but looking at our side of things you're the one who'll end up being harassed lots by us, you know~ that Maya out there's already putting on more moves on you lately, aren't you afraid?" Admiral: "I'm so going to get you punished for this, you know." Mutsu: "Oh please, your punishments are too soft I can't care about it a single bit. Here, how about a little bit of a bear hug from this Big Seven?" Admiral: "Geh!! I'm suffocating!" Haruna: "Mutsu''-san''! That's unfair! ... Haruna won't let you do as you please!" Admiral: "Knock it out you two! Are you trying to break my body or something!?" Hyuuga: "A bear hug, huh. I guess I'll play along." Admiral: "Et tu, Hyuuga!?" Ise: "Well, that looks fun! I'm joining in too~" Admiral: "NO! JUST NO! KIRISHIMA! HELP!" Kirishima: "That's enough, all of you. Commander looks like he's about to die from that. He's just an ordinary human, after all, no matter how sturdy he is he can't hold a candle to us." Mutsu: "Aw, Kirishima, you're no fun--" Kirishima (returns Mutsu a death glare): "I said, let him go. Can't you see how blue his face is right now?" Mutsu: "Oh my, you're right. We probably should stop now." Yamato: "Admiral, do you hate skinship that much?" Admiral: "Cough, cough... geh, I think I felt my soul leaving my body for a bit there. ... Anyway, Yamato, I'm just plain not good with them. You see, when they do that, I just kind of freeze over. It's like I'm being paralyzed." Mutsu: "Putting it that way is mean, Admiral. At least you could've given us a light poke, but hearing you say that is putting quite the dent into our confidence as women." Admiral: "You're all ships who turned into women somehow, though?" Mutsu: "Now you're just being insensitive." Admiral: "Hah... Anyways, I'm feeling a bit tired, I need to get some shuteye before I resume my paperwork." Mutsu: "How about I give you a lap-pillow?" (winks) Admiral (ignoring Mutsu's gesture): "I'll go to that couch over there... Kirishima, your next upgrade is ready, so wake me up in three hours time so we can get the upgrades started." Kirishima: "Really? That's good to hear. Have a good rest." The Admiral lies down on the couch nearby. Mutsu (pouting): "There he goes again, ignoring my kind gestures like that. You see that, Yamato?" Yamato: "... I think going easy for a bit is the way to go, though." Mutsu: "What do you mean?" Yamato: "He seems to be easily drawn towards offerings in the form of food." Mutsu: "Capturing him via his belly, huh. All right, this Onee-san has no intention of losing on that front." Haruna: "If it's cooking, Haruna is all right!" Kirishima: "Speaking of cooking, we need to check on Hiei onee-sama. Kongou onee-sama has been coaching her but she's showing very little improvement... oh, great. She's on the roster for tonight." The rest of the battleships turned their heads to Kirishima with various expressions of unease. Ise: "No! Not her! Not another round of culinary Russian roulette!" Hyuuga: "W-well. I expected that much." Mutsu: "I-I don't want to explode." Haruna: "H-Haruna is all right! Even if it's Hiei onee-sama! Because it's Hiei onee-sama! ... Haruna is... all right... maybe?" Yamato: "I wonder if I should help somehow." Admiral (rolling on the couch with his face facing away from them): "Keep the noise down, will you? I'm trying to fall asleep here!" -- Category:Blog posts